In honour of all the feasting we’ll be indulging in this Christmas!
The Health-Food Diner
by Maya Angelou
No sprouted wheat and soya shoots
And brussels in a cake
Carrot straw and spinach raw
(Today, I need a steak).
Not thick brown rice and rice pilau
Or mushrooms creamed on toast
Turnips mashed and parsnips hashed
(I’m dreaming of a roast).
Health-food folks around the world
Are thinned by anxious zeal
They look for help in seafood kelp
(I count on breaded veal).
No Smoking signs, raw mustard greens
Zucchini by the ton
Uncooked kale and bodies frail
Are sure to make me run
Loins of pork and chicken thighs
And standing rib, so prime,
Pork chops brown and fresh ground round
(I crave them all the time).
Irish stews and boiled corned beef
And hot dogs by the scores,
Or any space that saves a place
For smoking carnivores.